HELLO
I 've been away, I've been working towards a future for myself lately by finally looking to post secondary education ( or in my case, post nothjng education). I applied to the idea program at capilino, which seems to combine two things i love (creativity, pencils) with two things I love more (consultancy fees, sandwiches) and after spending a week not going to my daily grind, working on something i actually enjoyed, I find myself very much wishing I;d had the self respect to apply earlier. There has been a very active part of me that has been self sabotaging and diminishing my self and my sense of self worth since a long time ago, and it's always said I'm not worth anything and failure is in my blood and misery is my only true self. But like, fuck that. I finally stopped listening to myself and made a postive change in my life, and now i stand ready to maybe go to this one thing for a couple of years and have a career and a life and be finally proud of something i do, or if I don't get in, to go somewhere else and learn web design or something similar, because the one thing i think i proved to myself with this portfolio (the one i had to do to apply for design school) I learned that i can do something i am proud of. I'm not 100% satisfied with it, because I ran short of time, but looking at the whole thing, bound and submitted, I felt like I'd climbed everest. i've had talks over hte years with a lot of friends over the years about feeling like i do, and i've always said htat i won't be happy till i have things to be proud of, things to be happy for. well, I have san fransisco, I have this, i have hte soon to be available comic book form of this blog, and I have a million more ideas about how to be aweseome and awesome things to do, and knowing now that i will do them
what does this have to do with my return to words? two things; firstly, i haven''t written because i've been working hard for hte last few months on my thing, and two, because my homepage was reset to the schools page, so i would always be reminded to work on it instead of watching adorable or awesome youtube vidoes. the home page is back to blogger, the intent to commit more readable and worthwile thoughts to page is back, and things worth writing about, things that excite me, are back in my life.
I bought grand theft auto 4 today.
also here's back in black because i am back in the fucking black.
the drunkblog for drunky drunks
